What to expect when she’s expecting…..
So all of us who already have minis and those whose partners are expecting will have watched that movie.
And you will have probably seen the book, weather it’s on our expectant mums nightstand, sat on a book shelf or wafted under our noses for a read.
But how much help are they for us the expectant dad in waiting? I was that guy who was overly excited and who had a thirst for all pregnancy, labour and first nappy change knowledge I could get my hands on. I installed the apps, read the books, watched the movies and even took to watching ‘one born every minute’ in marathon stints on ITV player whilst tucking into whatever takeaway Alice was craving.
The problem I had was that after consuming all the information I could find I felt that none of it had actually spoke to me. Sure some of it was aimed at me but did it really talk to me? Answer my questions or make me feel more connected to what was about to happen? No!
It may have been just me but I really felt a huge disconnect through the pregnancy and even the first 6m. Sure it was happening to us and happening to me but e wasn’t growing inside me and she didn’t need me for the first 6m down to the breastfeeding. Alice was amazing and inclusive of me at all times, I attended every scan (we had 9. Expat health insurance, that’s another story) and was so happy to be an expectant father and new dad but nothing had prepared me for how much of a third wheel that I would feel.
So in this series I am going to talk as honestly as I can (facing the wrath of alice) about how I felt during the time with e and how I feel now that we are one trimester down.
Stay tuned for the first installment on Monday where I tall about ‘the decision’ the moment you choose that fatherhood is for you. I will give you a clue, it’s okay to not actually be ready, to not be prepared and to be unbelievably terrified.